Aftermath

Today's P&L: Pesky weekends!

Today's Booze: So far 6 pints of Cobra larger and 6 pints of dry cider...


Well, made it through another New Year, what a result! The ex girlfriend, who I have come to regard as a somewhat welcome stalker moderated my behavior but I still managed to get loaded by judicious mixing of beverages and generous pouring techniques. I had to have sex with her of course, but I have come to realize there is no such thing as a free lunch.

Anyway, I don't think I offended anyone too much, so that's a good thing. One of the reasons I never attempt the old twelve step programs is that, to be honest, that step where you have to apologize or make amends to the people you have upset - well, I would never have the time and wouldn't know where to start. I don't think I am a bad person, just somewhat inconsiderate. Lots of descriptions of me have involved the words fucking idiot and morally reprehensible, my father usually just uses the term insane and at a family gathering I failed to attend, birthday party for me actually, my brother described me as a "nasty piece of work", which seemed to go down well. As a boyfriend I have been described as a cross between Billy Bob Thornton in Bad Santa and Tank in My Best Friends Girl. Of course in my mind I am Cary Grant in the Philadelphia Story. Its funny how your self image is often at odds with other peoples. On the bright side, the stalker has decided to take our relationship "one day at a time" which considering she was all for forcing me to marry her, I liken to going from Defcon 2 to Defcon 4. Everyone who knows her tells me that if I let her slip through my fingers I will be sorry for the rest of my life, like my eternal happiness depends upon her. The general consensus seems to be that I am such a liability to myself that I must grab this lifeline at all costs. Well I did okay before she came back on the scene and anyway surely if she is so keen to acquire me she must be even more fucked up than I am!